LIL

Saturday, September 09, 2006

read this on today newspaper on thursday september 7...i think its a daily column (not sure) named focus on the family...by dr james dobson...seriously it never fails to be meaningful and enlightening...although some of the things may not apply to me now...but it may be useful in the future...this one is relevant though

Comparing Yourself With Others

Someone once said," Comparison is the root of all inferiority". How true that is. When you look at another person's strengths and compare them to your own weaknesses, there is just no possibility of feeling good about yourself. Young people are especially vulnerable to making comparisons.

Once, I was speaking to a group of teenagers at a conference, and I'll never forget the question posed by one young man. He said," It seems that everyone has more to offer than I do. I envy the guys who are better looking than I am, more athletic or smarter. I just don't measure up. How can I deal with my own insecurities?" The problem is was describing is common among young men and women. Even at a young age, our self-image is shaped by how we stack up against our peers. It's not how tall we are that matters - it's who is the tallest. It's not how fast we run - it's who runs fastest. It's not how smart we are - it's who is the smartest. This, a pattern of self-doubt that often becomes all-consuming when adolescence begins. The answer I gave that young man is one that many teenagers need to hear;" When you pit yourself against the best and brightest, you are merely setting yourself up for failure."

Mental health begins with an acceptance of life as it is and a willingness to make the most of the unique strengths and talents you've been given. When that is achieved, comparison with others is no longer a relevant issue.